Tag: prayer

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Esau, the Hero?

img_20161110_095240I love Old Testament stories from the Bible. I know many of them like I know my own hand. I see myself in them at times. I think that’s a sign of maturity. Before, all I could do was look at them and think, “Wow! They did what?” And, “How could they not believe God if he said he would do it?” Oh, it’s easy to rail and condemn … until you’ve lived through similar circumstances. Some of my best loved and most encouraging tales are of those “rejected by man but later revealed to be handpicked by God.” (George Johnson)

I give you the example of Esau and Jacob, fraternal twins. Esau grew up beloved of their father, Isaac. Jacob was Rebekah’s favorite. Esau was wild and hairy, an outdoors-man and likely every thing a man could want in a son. He was the epitome of macho. But his younger brother stayed at home. Jacob grew up near his mother, attached to her apron strings, likely tending livestock as he would later do for his Uncle Laban. Jacob was not a hunter and rugged like Esau. But he was cunning. Jacob and his mother plotted to trick Esau out of his blessing (he’d already foolishly given away his birthright to Jacob). Because Esau’s anger was so great, Rebekah sent Jacob away fearing that his brother would kill her dearest son.

While on the run, Jacob found God and began to serve him. The Lord blessed Jacob, raining blessings that continue to follow his descendants to this day. But Jacob had to deal with his own thorn – the deceit of his Uncle Laban. From the onset Laban lied. He tricked Jacob into marrying his daughter Leah when Jacob really loved Rachel. Then Laban repeatedly changed the terms under which Jacob labored. Jacob reaped what he’d done to his brother Esau many times over and had a long while (at least 14 years) to think about it. Time has a way of doing that, causing us to soften our views and regret some of the decisions we’ve made. One day, Jacob decided he’d had enough of Laban’s lies, took his family and ran. Laban caught up with his daughters and son-in-law but being warned of God, merely kissed his family good bye. He and Jacob made a pact to not harm each other and Jacob promised to take good care of his wives.

Jacob returned to his homeland, after a wrestling match with an Angel of the Lord and receiving his new name (Israel), to find his brother, Esau, coming to meet them. “Oh, God,” he must have thought. Now, I have to meet the man I have so grievously wronged. Having been cheated by Laban, Jacob surely fully understood by this time what he’d done to his brother. He prepared to meet Esau with trepidation, dividing the women and children into camps to ensure someone would get away. He sent droves of animals ahead of him as gifts for his brother, hoping to soften him up for the reunion. Jacob was afraid, well and truly, not only because of retribution but because it was deserved. But when he finally saw Esau, something strange and unforeseen occurred:

But Esau ran to meet Jacob and embraced him; he threw his arms around his neck and kissed him. And they wept. (Genesis 33:4)

In this, Jacob knew that his brother, with whom he’d shared a womb, missed and forgave him. Esau inquired of all the animals that came before the party. When told they were gifts, Esau replied, “Keep them, I have plenty.” You see, in all those years, Esau had done some thinking, too. He’d had time to come to terms with what happened. But also, he saw that whatever blessing Jacob had taken away didn’t prevent him from also being blessed. God had given Esau a good life, as well, just because he was Isaac’s son and descended from Abraham. And maybe because Esau, too, had undergone a change of heart.

I see now in this story two examples: both Jacob and Esau were rejected in the beginning by either parent. But they both came into their own blessing and gift with no need to be jealous of, or compete, with the other. Each had plenty. Many things are said of Esau in the Bible, not often good. He was despised of God, perhaps because of his haughty spirit. Or maybe simply because God wanted to turn the order of things on end, having the eldest serve the younger, as He is often wont to do. But I have learned something about Esau that is not mentioned in the Bible – his capacity for love. And I’m not just talking about brotherly love, I mean agape love, that love that forgives the ugliest of sins and offenses against us. Godly love. Who woulda thunk that the oft maligned Esau would prove to be such an example?

I said all that to say this: You never know what someone will do or who they will turn out to be. They may surprise you – in a good way. Donald Trump has been elected President of these United States, incredulously. Someone that began as the butt of jokes has turned the tables and is now become leader of the free world. I take heart in Esau’s example today, for he also began as a despicable man, the villain in the story. He eventually came to be a man able to minister grace and mercy to his offender. God is able to heal relationships and this country. Whatever your party affiliation, I suggest you pray for DT and his reign, and not in a negative way, because what he will do affects us all. Perhaps, he will prove to be like Solomon, who asked the Lord for wisdom to rule the great kingdom of Israel at the beginning of his reign. I believe and hope for the best but the truth is, we won’t know for about four more years just how all of this will impact us. Whether he turns out to be good or bad, time will reveal. But this I do know, if he is President, God has ordained it, for whatever reason. “We may throw the dice, but the LORD determines how they fall.” (Proverbs 16:33) May the Lord bless and keep us all.

Loria

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Impossible Faith

14608673_544774999049471_343328373344812361_o“That’s an oxymoron,” said my sister. They don’t belong in the same sentence, impossible and faith.

Ah, but here’s the thing, I responded. Not that it’s only an impossible event you expect to occur, but that you have to nerve to believe it. Impossibly so. People will marvel at your faith in the face of such obstacles. Impossible faith renders life’s circumstances possible.

It’s hard to have faith when dealing with seemingly insurmountable barriers. Believe anyway. People will laugh and ridicule you. Believe anyhow. They will make you feel simple minded … until you do it. It will take crazy, unshakeable, impossible faith to reach your goals. But, once you have accomplished it, you won’t seem so crazy.

I saw a wonderful movie on Netflix, Little Boy. I  highly recommend it! It’s about believing in spite of what it looks like, no matter what it looks like. I loved it so much, I walked away from that movie with my faith in God and in my own abilities strengthened. You just gotta continue to believe! Faith is not passive, nor is it for the faint of heart. Someone will definitely come along and challenge your stance, making you feel foolish. But I take comfort in this scripture: Wisdom is justified by her children (Luke 7:35). It’s the end of the thing that declares it. So let the haters hate, the mockers mock, and the naysayers say what they will. Believe God and let them think you are crazy.

Loria

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New Again

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And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. And he said unto me, Write: for these words are true and faithful. Revelation 21:5

I seem to have gone through more than my fair share of trials lately. Ever felt that way? Then you wonder what it is you’re doing wrong. I’ve been asking, seeking and knocking (more like banging, LOL!) to no avail. Until it occurred to me – things keep happening to me. There’s something passive about that, as if I had nothing to do with it, therefore nothing can be done to prevent it. That doesn’t wash with me. I feel there is always something that can be done. Then another word came to mind. Allow. It gave my participation, or lack of, a name. You’ve allowed these things to happen to you, Loria. What? How? Where? For the answer, I went back to the beginning, when I re-set my life.

For me, everything began anew with my divorce. That’s when I began to live. Sounds strange, right? But it’s true. At that time, I stopped letting things happen to me and took more control over my life, the lives of my children and our future. It was a glorious rebellion, a hostile takeover – it was not given to me, I took it by force. For years, I heard Oprah sing the praises of keeping a personal journal. I did not heed her at the time because I was too busy. And I thought my life was fine, which it was because I never took the time to closely examine it. A clue was given me, that something was wrong, when I went to see a dietitian about my eating habits, ostensibly, to lose weight. But that session became so much more when she made a simple request: Describe to me what your day is like. 

I found myself in tears as I gave her the details of my life. Crying, for I knew not what. I was embarrassed. I never went back. But I recognized that feeling. I felt overwhelmed, like my life was not my own. She summed it up thusly: Wow – sounds like your life is kinda on auto pilot and you’re just hanging on for the ride! She was so right. My life was happening in a way and at a pace that left me running just to keep up. I had lost control.

Which brings me to my recent revelation. I asked myself, Loria, what is different about your life now? How did it get so out of control, again? Why are you letting things just happen to you instead of taking more of an active role? This time, the answer came quickly: journaling. Keeping a journal made the difference then and has already improved things of late. My journal is more than a record of what happened during my days, it’s a diary of my prayers. When I look back over them, I see that I have all that I ever asked God for during that transitional period in my life. Prayer is like an arrow – it gives you focus and aim to better enable you to hit your target. It’s like providing direction for your life. When I didn’t write it down, I became aimless and I fell for far too many distractions.

Moreover, writing less often removed the desire for me to write altogether. So, I found myself in a cycle once again of life happening and me just keeping up with the shenanigans. Writing the vision makes it plain – that the reader may see and run with it! Write that vision, Loria! Write it down – this is too important. Otherwise, you’ll continue to tread water and spin your wheels while you wait for something better to happen. It’s not gonna if you don’t direct it. God’s plan for me is good – to give me a future and a hope, an expected end. I’ve said this before and now I write to remind myself: write the ending you expect! Write that vision, girl! What you want out of life, claim it. I was waiting on God and becoming more frustrated but as usual, turns out he was waiting on me.

I’ve got my head twisted on straight now and I’m ready to re-enter the fight. Thank you, Lord, for giving me back my drive and ambition. Thank you for mistakes I’ve made along the way. I will not regret them because they are part of the process and necessary lessons to get me where I want to go. And, get me to where YOU want me to be so that you can bless me even more. I’m not afraid anymore for my future, I know you’re already there and you’ve made provision. I’m excited to see the things you have in store for me. You’re the God of better, of more than enough. You make all things new, AGAIN. Let’s get it – LET’S GO!

Be blessed,

Loria

For the vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall speak, and not lie:

though it tarries, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not delay. Habakkuk 2:3

 

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It Starts With Us

philando-castile“The Lorax came out of me being angry. In The Lorax I was out to attack what I think are evil things and let the chips fall where they might.” Dr. Seuss

I saw the press conference where the fifteen year old son of Alton Sterling broke down. He tried to be there for his mother, as the oldest of five children, while she talked about how Alton was killed by police. Her son hid his face in a corner of his shirt as she spoke on the tragedy but grief soon overwhelmed him. I’m sure he had heard of the deaths of Mike Brown, Sandra Bland, Tamir Rice and others at the hands of law enforcement. He was old enough to know, as the entire black community in every city now realizes, it could happen to any of us, at any given time. But how can you prepare for this tragedy? It makes no sense. Our life expectancy shouldn’t be shortened because we are black. But none of us, man nor woman, young or old, are exempt no matter how compliant we are. I’m just as certain Sterling’s son thought, as anyone would under similar circumstances: NOT MY FATHER. How did things turn for the worse so quickly? Unbelievable. And inexplicable. It’s a sad day in America when this has become the norm, the killing of black citizens for routine infractions. It was an unjustifiable violent act against an unarmed man. A sad day, not just for blacks, but for every American.

Lately, I’ve been recalling to mind a novel by Stephenie Meyer, The Host. I enjoyed it although it didn’t reach the same level of fame as its predecessor, Twilight. The premise was one we’ve heard before – aliens come to earth and inhabit our bodies. It was regarded as a hostile takeover by humans but as one much needed by an alien race with superior technology. Because they were peaceful, they viewed our society as barbaric. They watched us for a while in secrecy and viewed our news reports. They saw all the evil that men do. These glowing, caterpillar-like creatures were inserted into the minds of humans and changed their behavior. The alien race did away with crime, poverty and sickness. As Wanda, the host, explained, “We make life better.” They were saving us and our planet from us. We were the villains.

I can’t help but agree with the assessment of Wanda’s alien race on our society. Looking at our news reports is enough to make us see the need for change. We need a takeover. And though I can be a Pollyanna and choose to live optimistically, my hopes do not lie in us ever getting it together. The Bible tells us a Utopian existence can only be ushered in upon Jesus’ return. I wait and hope for that day but live in the here and now. What about THIS day? People say: We need to do more than pray! And that is true. Actions are in order. But let us not forget that prayer is our most effective weapon against evil. When the folks who are in authority misuse their power, it is the epitome of the spiritual wickedness that sits in high places. It is for this reason that our weapons of warfare cannot only be those we can see (Ephesians 6:12).

This morning I cried as I learned of the death of yet another, Philando Castile, at the hands of police. I’m angry, frustrated, fed up and tired of all three. Lots of folks on social media are silent. Speechless, I think, because we cannot comprehend the horror. We don’t watch the video because we don’t wanna know. We don’t want to cry or have sympathy for the victim because that destroys our illusion of safety via compliance. The idea that someone could deserve such a fate is ludicrous. The truth is, it can happen to anyone – black or white – and it has. There are those who like to interject: What about black on black crime? As if that could be an excuse for reprehensible behavior on the part of police. What about white on white crime? Asian on Asian? Latino? LGBT? So what? One has nothing to do with the other. Shame on those who jump to defend the perpetrators with such an argument without sparing one moment of sympathy for a life taken senselessly and so soon. But even had you cried, it would have changed nothing. But you might have been stirred to action. So let us be done with our tears and victim blaming and find a solution to this problem.

Years ago, I stood in a grocery line that was only slightly backed up and watched as the cashier gave the elderly lady in front of her hell for going over the limit and for using food stamps. Because it was a cash only line, the cashier claimed that food stamps were not cash. She was about as disrespectful to the old lady as you could be without cursing. I looked at the motherly woman and saw my own Madear and thought: She better not try that with me! And all the things I would do and say to her. When it was my turn, she proved just as belligerent to me. Of course, I told her off and called her manager to report her. He merely agreed with me, said she had been reprimanded in the past but he would talk to her again. Too late, I saw that instead of waiting for my chance to stand against her alone, I should have stood up for the old lady and then it would have been BOTH of us against her. That would have been quite a ruckus. Too many times we wait until it is time to defend our own. We walk away because we don’t want to get involved. But there is strength in numbers.

Repeatedly, the Bible urges us to “watch and pray.” The time has passed for praying only. When you see that there is a problem, instead of saying: “Someone should do something about that,” know that God has called you. Esther could have stayed comfortable in the palace and watched as her people were killed, but her Uncle Mordecai urged her to identify with the Jewish population and speak up. She fasted and prayed, then she acted. And we should watch for those opportunities to say something, putting ourselves in the shoes of those of us who are being persecuted instead of distancing ourselves. We think if we are not like them, we are safe. But this last gentleman who was killed was just a regular guy. The time has come for us to not continue to turn blind eyes and deaf ears to the problem just because it makes us uncomfortable. People are dying. In America.

Oh Lord, that you would come in and inhabit us with your spirit so that we can no longer commit vile acts against each other, being neither the recipient, nor the perpetrator. Let those who are guilty receive their just recompense. Reward them according to their deeds for only you know their hearts. Teach us to pray, give us the words to say to move you on our behalf. But you already have: Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth, as it is in heaven. This is your model for prayer. And if it weren’t possible to have your will be done in this life, I don’t think you would have included that line in your example. So we will pray until YOUR will is accomplished. I don’t believe what we’re living is it. I also pray and remember that when the Israelites were oppressed and cried out for deliverance, you answered them time and again. We are your people, too. And you will answer us, for you love justice. A perfect society may be too much to hope for, but you make things better. We all can do better.

“Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It’s not,” The Lorax.

Be blessed,

Loria

 

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Chasing God

runners-373099_1280“But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” Matthew 6:33

“I’m chasing after you, no matter what I have to do – ‘cause I need you more and more!” Chasing after you, Bishop Paul Morton

I remember hearing Claire Huxtable sing, “Seek ye first,” with the Hillman (aka Spelman) choir on the Cosby Show years ago. It was a beautiful rendition – oh, the harmonies! I just loved the song and the message. But to the young girl I was then, the idea of foregoing all the things I wanted to do and pursue was the waste of my opportunity to have a good time. Serving God could get in the way of that. Fun and adventure awaited me, I had my whole life ahead of me. Put God first? To me that meant church, church and more church, LOL! I thought, later for that! You mean I can’t live my life, do what I want to do, go where I want to go? I gotta be all holy? Really wasn’t trying to hear it.

But as the Bible says, when I was a child, I spake as a child. After having lived half a century on this here earth, I’ve learned a thing or two. One, that I put all of that energy into doing what I wanted to do first and it got me nowhere. I didn’t do it God’s way. Two, that chasing church is not the same as chasing God. You can attend church several days a week and give all your money in the offering plate, but it won’t get you closer to God. Only time spent with Him, in the Word, and trusting and relying on Him, building that relationship will do that.

Until recently, I was still unable to fully embrace the concept of going after God, not the things of this world, and trusting him to provide and grant me the desires of my heart in the process. God is spoon feeding the revelation to me, only as much as I can handle, before moving on to the next lesson He has for me. He’s building it line upon line, precept upon precept. After An Open Heaven revealed that we have access to God, ALWAYS, it occurred to me that there was a responsibility now on me. Not so much to do more, but to turn to Him more and rely on Him only. I had spent my life in the pursuit of things – money, health, job, love. I guess I kinda just thought He would find a way to fit in there organically, LOL! But that’s not how this works, as the lady in the commercial says. That’s not how any of this works!

When God revealed to me the gospel truth that I have access to Him, it revolutionized my way of thinking. Once I realized all that He is doing for me, I asked the question: What must I do? What is my response to His goodness? Notice that I’m not trying to invoke His blessing. I already have it. But I want to be up under Him, under His wings, basking in the glow of His love, sitting at His feet and learning. I find that the more time I spend with Him the more time I WANT to spend in His presence.

And God is going to do more, even greater than He already has in my life. It’s already begun. He’s doing it right now, just in changing the way I think and pray. He’s shifted my focus. I used to pray for Him to change my situation, now I look for Him to change me. I see that the more I grow, the more my situation changes. One day I considered this scripture: Beloved, I wish above all things that you may prosper and be in health, even as your soul prospers. (3 John 1:2)

Now, I took that to mean that as I grew spiritually, I would also prosper financially and physically. I visualize a set of scales, with one side representing your soul and the other ALL of the things you feel you need and want. As you add to the side that truly matters, feeding your spirit man, the other side would balance out accordingly. And that makes sense. I’m seeking a harmony of both in my life. So, all of these years that I have been chasing these things, they would have come to me, had I chased HIM. I’ve been putting the cart before the horse. I’ve been doing it all wrong.

As a matter of fact, the verse preceding the well-known, seek ye first scripture admonishes us to NOT worry about all of that – what to wear, what to drink, or where to live. God knows that we need that. That’s basic. But if we go after Him, these things will come after us. So I’ve made up my mind to be done with the foolishness, this way that does not work, and pursue God only, trusting that he will bring the things that I not only need but also desire into my life.

Ah, but there’s something else at work here. An element of SURRENDER. If I give it all to you, Lord, I’m trusting you with the outcome. And faith, too – cuz you gotta believe that He can DO IT! Oh, so many good things are coming from drawing closer to you and they’re not only tangible. Grow me, Lord, like a flower. Increase me, Father, so I can do more of Your will. Decrease me, so that I can be filled with more of you. I don’t want anything right now more than I want you. More of you, Lord, is my prayer.

Be blessed,

Loria

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An Open Heaven

clouds-385290_1280So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me.” John 11:41

I sat in church on Sunday and listened as the pastor expounded on his topic. See, this is the Year of Jubilee in Jerusalem, according to the pastor. Every seven years God granted the Israelites a get out of jail free card, so to speak. It was a time when every man was forgiven his debt and regained his freedom if he were enslaved. He could start over fresh. (Our bankruptcy laws seem to follow this pattern.) After seven cycles of these periods of forgiveness, the Year of Jubilee was proclaimed and the Israelites were assured of additional blessings, i.e., given back property that he’d mortgaged, for example. So the pastor had a list of seven blessings that he determined were also a result of Jubilee: Presence of God, double portion, family blessings, miracles, financial abundance, restored relationships and an open heaven.

My mind fixated on that last one, considering the possibilities. I got excited the more I thought about it. I mean, I really bought into it. I believed it meant I could pray and have God’s ear always and therefore, was more likely to have my request granted. Every blessing listed could be mine, similar to how Solomon asked for wisdom and received wealth and peace, as well. The concept seemed to me a wonderful catchall. It covered everything. It was like getting a surprise bonus, a twofer, a bogo. (You should have seen me the other night when my brother got my frozen yogurt free with his purchase at my favorite shop, LOL!) I latched on to the idea eagerly. The pastor said, “Point to your blessing and call it out!” (The words were displayed prominently around the walls of the sanctuary.) Obediently, I pointed to An Open Heaven, figuring it would get me the most bang for my buck! I receive it, I cried aloud with the rest of the congregation.

But my mind said, “Hey! Wait a minute!” The entire premise is predicated on our covenant being the same as the Israelites. But it’s actually not. The covenant of Israel can seem appealing (blessed coming and going, in the city and the field, lender not a borrower and all that) but the new covenant is better. The old testament or covenant is contingent on being able to keep the law. If you break one, you are guilty of all. The new covenant, the Bible says, is a better covenant. The blood of Jesus does what the sacrifices of goats and bulls could not do. It saves and cleanses and forgives and restores continually. While we are descendants of Abraham (“And if you be Christ’s, then are you Abraham’s seed, and heirs according to the promise.” Galatians 3:29) because of our faith, we are entitled and can lay claim to the promises made to him.  It’s just not limited to a certain time during a specific year.

I realized that Jesus died so that I can have access to heaven every second of every minute of every hour of every day. Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year. So in reality, I already have the ear of God, always. He hears me and answers my prayers. I don’t need to proclaim a special year to receive that. My former pastor once said of the coming new year, “Every year can’t be your year!” Au contraire mon frère! Oh, but it can! Because the veil has been taken away, I have unlimited access to God. I can come boldly, confidently to his throne and make my request as His daughter.

I was elated. If news of one Jubilee year got me excited, a lifetime of being able to claim these blessings made an even bigger impact. Membership has privileges, I thought to myself as I quoted an old commercial. I became bolder in my prayer life and began to believe God for more. And I saw more results. What if, all this time, I was only hindered by my belief or lack thereof? So I began to pray like Jesus and know I have the very ear of God. I no longer wonder now. I know this of a certainty. Thank you Father, that you always hear me. Oh, the blessings in store for us now that we know we have them! I feel I have found a treasure that is secret no longer. And that is good news, indeed!

Be blessed,

Loria